7: An Experimental Mutiny Against Excess-Chapter 2 Day 7

I just finished laundering most of my 7.  I'm trying to get spilled gas and its aroma out of them.  I ran out of gas, yesterday, rounding the corner of the Washington School carpool lane.  It seems cold temperatures trick my gas gauge into thinking there is more gas than there really is (it has happened twice now).

In my mind, the quickest method to getting my van running, again, was to walk over a mile to the nearest gas station.  Little did I know, this would be the easy part (brutal cold, no boots & no additional layers and all!). Once back at the van, standing in the biting sub-zero temps, I could not figure out how to assembly the gas can nozzle. It should be easy, right?  Just assemble the nozzle and pour the gas in.  Not this can! It had pieces to be assembled!  And, I couldn't quite figure out how the gas was going to get from the container through the spout and out the top when a permanently fixed white disc was covering it!  And forget the diagram on the side.  It might as well have been in Chinese.

I was bone chilling cold and I didn't want to waste an ounce of the precious gas by doing it incorrectly.  I was paralyzed with stress and couldn't think clearly.  I was in a tearful panic mode when God sent help in the form of Tanya.  She couldn't figure out the can either.  She headed into the school with it.  And, emerged a few minutes later with Principal Svenby.  Turns out you need to push down on the nozzle to get the white disc at the top to lift up to allow the gas through. What the what?

Principal Svenby told me, "If this ever happens, again, (Dear God, I really hope not!) just come into the school for help.  Why didn't I just do that in the first place?  First, because in my mind I really thought the quickest route to solving the problem was going to get the gas.  It seemed an easy enough solution to me.

But, more than that, it is because I try to live up to the "Me" other people want me to be. I feel like I need to be the "Supermom" everyone tells me I am.  I know to others "Supermom" is a compliment.  To me "Supermom" reminds me of all my failures and shortcomings.  Superheros have extraordinary super human powers. They possess abilities such as:

Superhuman strength, speed, hearing, longevity, stamina, and intelligence Invulnerability Heat Vision Flight Freezing breath Multiple extrasensory and vision powers not limited to but including X-ray vision Healing factor

 Expectations I just can't live up to or achieve.  It sets me up for failure.  Superheroes don't ask for help.  They help everyone else.  Carry everyone else on their back.  I need to break free of this label.  See it merely as a compliment and nothing more.  Don't try to own it or achieve it.  Don't allow it to prevent me from becoming the me I was meant to be.  

When I find myself in these predicaments, I need to rely on the one and only superhero, God.  Don't let stress paralyze me or labels define me, but place my trust wholeheartedly in God to guide me through it.  

O Lord, you have examined my heart

and you know everything about me.

You know when I sit down or stand up.

You know everything I do.

You know what I am going to say

even before I say it, LORD.

You go before me and follow me.

You place your hand of blessing on my head.

Such knowledge is wonderful for me,

too great for me to understand!   Psalm 139:1-6

You saw me before I was born.

Every day of my life was recorded in you book.

Every moment was laid out

before a single day had passed.

How precious are your thoughts about me, O God.

They cannot be numbered!  Psalm 139:16-17

To quote a line from the movie Mom's Night Out...“I’m a Mess.  But I’m a Beautiful Mess.  I’m His Masterpiece, and that’s Enough.”